In my line of work, I often hear of toxic work environments that cause deep and abiding negative hurts. And no wonder why. With the number of hours that we spend in the office toiling alongside colleagues, it is easy for them to hold sway over how we perceive our value and worth. How can you protect yourself from bosses who are unsympathetic, colleagues who betray us, and passive aggressive cultures?

The long term emotional abuse, and criticism can leave long lasting scars in people’s psyche as they start to internalise the negative feedback regarding their performance or their personal attributes. When bosses lack empathy they often create a toxic environment that crushes creativity and innovation along with the employees’ souls. It’s impossible to develop a successful business plan or devise an imaginative sales strategy when one feels worthless. Managers need to be trained to amplify the positive traits of their team members; give clear and kind suggestions about the attributes that could be improved and praise, praise, praise the good efforts regardless of the business outcome. You need to reinforce whatever you need more of…

I have witnessed dedicated and resourceful employees lose confidence in their abilities, eventually get depressed whilst they are passively disengaged from work projects. They will often wait to be fired and receive the compensation. High attrition rate is one of the most damaging factors in the business world. There is such a waste of potential, great ideas and revenue. I frequently counsel employees who are perpetually bullied and doubted by their bosses. Once, they regain their self-esteem and have a clear understanding of the work dynamics, they move on to another organization where they are allowed and supported to thrive. They become significant contributors of the new company’s success.

  1. Recognition: If you find yourself having a negative/toxic thought about a colleague, change it to a positive/productive thought. Mentally healthy people want to contribute at the workplace, they want to be part of the success. But if you predetermine their potential and performance, it would take a very strong individual to keep trying/creating in the face of adversity.
  2. Counter tactics: How do you deal with a passive aggressive boss? The best tactic is to ot lose sight of your creative abilities. Your boss criticism is not necessarily true. Seek mentorship from an external qualified third party and reflect on your performance. You can attempt to talk with your passive aggressive boss and praising him/her on his achievements might decrease the need to “fight” you. The most common root cause of aggression in the workplace is the fear of not being outshined. Hence, giving positive reinforcement to your boss/colleague might relax his fear of worthlessness.
  3. Counter tactics: How do you deal with a lazy colleague that is trying to take all the credit without doing the work? You definitely avoid a direct confrontation. Have faith that his incompetence will be uncovered. Maintain your confidence in your work. Try to keep in mind that he/she is trying to “steal your thunder” as he/she doesn’t believe he/she can produce good results. Fear is driving this dishonest behaviour.
  4. Counter tactics: How do you work with a boss who does not understand boundaries? Confrontation or any type of altercation should be dismissed as a potential solution. It would only inflame the strenuous atmosphere. Reinstate the boundaries indirectly by working in a manner that is in congruence with your work standards and ethics. If you avoid highly charged interaction, your boss will be more likely to accept your boundaries. Yet, you might have to quietly reinforce your desired boundaries a few times until they become the baseline.
  5. Actions: How do you keep work at work, without bringing it home to your family? All you need to do is to apply emotional intelligence. If it’s not a matter of “life and death” you don’t work at home. Unwinding and bonding with your family members will only rejuvenate you to be more creative and innovative the next day. You need space in order to repair and grow your body and mind.
  6. Behaviour: What are the benefits of recognising patterns, and learning to manage them positively? When you feel empty and dry, that means you are close to a burnout. Take half a day off and do what a young kid would do. Your energy levels will be replenished and ideas will start flying in your head.
  7. Change: How can you change the way you lead to bring out the best in your workplace? Talk with your team members. Gaze work through their eyes. Ask them what they need to work more efficiently and feel recognized. Remember all mentallu healthy people want to contribute and perform. Create an inviting work environment and give them the necessary tools to succeed.
  8. Depression: How can you avoid becoming depressed over work? Maintaining a balance amongst work, your own mental/physical wellbeing and family/social relationships is a must. You need to nurture yourself through love, good nutrition and exercise. Work can’t do that for you. In the event the balance is not achieved, you are opening yourself to emotional/mental challenges as well as physical illnesses (i.e. heart disease, cancer).
  9. Burn out: How do you recognise burnout in yourself? If you feel you have lost your desire to create, or enjoy life, you are likely to be experiencing a burnout. A burnout can be harmful for your health, your family members and your work environment. You need time to repair the damage away from work stressors. It will be beneficial to seek the help of a clinical mental health professional to help you go through the recovery process.
© Maria Micha. All Rights Reserved. All articles and content belong to Maria Micha and may not be reproduced or used without express permission.

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